Make-Out with Violence (2010): C-

Make-Out with Violence plays like a faux-Wes Anderson remake of The Virgin Suicides, if Kirsten Dunst’s ethereal beauty had turned into a zombie – or, perhaps more accurately, the film feels like the work of a Donnie Darko fan intent on crafting his very own Deadly Friend. Either way, those descriptions are infinitely more flattering than the reality of the Deagol Brothers’ directorial debut, a dreadfully pretentious genre-bender about the pain of unrequited love. During the summer after high school graduation, beloved Wendy (Shellie Marie Shartzer) goes missing, thus shaking the earth under the feet of twin brothers Patrick (Eric Lehning) – who had a major crush on Wendy – and Carol (Cody DeVos), who desires Wendy’s best friend Addy (Leah High). Out in the woods one day, a zombified Wendy is discovered by Carol and his younger brother Beetle (Brett Miller), and transported to the empty home of another friend, where she’s fawned over with creepy adoration by Patrick, all while Carol awkwardly attempts to woo Addy. Shartzer’s impersonation of a living dead girl, all backbreaking postures and clumsy limbs, is unsettling, but the rest of the Deagol Brothers’ film is largely insufferable, an amalgamation of photocopied elements that itself lacks any trace of serious thought or sincere emotion, what with its drama wrapped up in precious two-bit lyricism. Quirky narration from Beetle, random on-screen text and a fondness for elegiac ‘80s tunes typify Make-Out with Violence, which – through stilted dialogue and look-at-me sunset sequences fit for a cruddy music video – assumes such an affected air of longing and sorrow that those emotions never materialize.