Funniest Part: Jerry Seinfeld advocating movie theater littering, while the crowd laughed uncomfortably.
Scariest Part: Jennifer Hudson's jiggling cleavage during the Dreamgirls number.
Strangest PA Comment: That J-Lo is the best reason to upgrade to HDTV (a close second: that the Little Miss Sunshine screenwriter was once Matthew Broderick's personal assistant).
Best Comedy Killer: Tom Hanks, making an Alcoholics Anonymous joke.
Most Irritating Theme of the Night: Go, Three Amigos, Go!
Most Embarrassing Moment: When Coppola, Lucas and Spielberg were dubbed the "original" Three Amigos.
Most Telegraphed Moment #1: Martin Scorsese's (deserved) win, which was guaranteed when Coppola, Lucas and Spielberg were announced a couple of days ago as the Best Director presenters.
Most Telegraphed Moment #2: Jennifer Hudson's win, which was guaranteed the second the Best Supporting Actress award presentation (which usually kicks off the proceedings) was moved deep into the show.
Biggest Surprise: The Lives of Others winning Best Foreign Film over Pan's Labyrinth.
Best Part: Ellen DeGeneres' bit with Eastwood and Spielberg (a close second: the Jack Black-Will Ferrell-John C. Reilly number).
Worst Part: The goofy, time-wasting, this-is-why-the-show-runs-so-long silhouette dance sequences.
Moment that Best Epitomized the Oscars: The sound effects choir, which was bizarre, annoying, laughable and meaningless.